Alistair Begg, Gay Marriage, and Christian Maturity

Recently, Alistair Begg has received a lot of attention for his comments condoning someone’s attendance of a gay wedding. There are several things we should consider here that are not being talked about by the masses. 

First, situations like this always reveal the gross immaturity of a wide variety of Christians. When someone’s first response is to criticize, proclaim their knowledge, or insert their two cents into an argument, we usually call that immaturity. Yet Christians regularly do this to people with whom they disagree, and particularly online. The twitter (or X?) wars are intense. 

Our goal should be to gain “all wisdom, that we may present everyone mature in Christ” (Col. 1:28). According to Proverbs, wisdom thinks before speaking, weighs opinions carefully, and seeks out humility and prudence. How often are these things seen on social media? And maturity is leaving childish things behind, Paul says elsewhere, and arguing with quickly-opened tongues is pretty childish. 

In addition to these things, a quick look at church history helps us. Name one event where staunchy, argumentative people made lasting progress for the universal body of Christ? I will wait. While I wait, I could name many events where careful, humility-saturated, and informed discourse has given the church amazing things and spurred others on to greater Christ-likeness. 

Irenaeus was a church father who was known for mediating major controversies and disagreements between churches or church groups. His name has come to mean his role—to be irenic is to prefer peace to controversy and to seek order and harmony in place of strife. This is Christianly.

Notice I did not say we ought to seek peace in place of accuracy or taking a stand for the truth. Christians always ought to be bold for the truth and seek to not compromise, but strife and outrageous controversy is never condoned by scripture. Proverbs 17:14 says, “The beginning of strife is like letting out water, so quit before the quarrel breaks out.” Do not add to strife, dear Christian—seek to abate it. The command of God to us is this: “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all” (Rom. 12:18). 

In terms of what Begg has actually said, I would implore anyone to go and listen to his words firsthand before weighing in. Far too many comments have represented one phrase taken out of context or a lack of knowledge altogether—be better than that. Listen to the horse’s mouth. 

In light of this, I will refrain from commenting on Begg’s speech here. This is not because I shy away from the truth, support homosexuality, or whatever you might be tempted to think. My stand on that issue should be obvious, and my love for proclaiming truth is hopefully self-evident by the existence of this blog. 

What we do know is this—Begg is a godly pastor who loves the Lord, his sheep, and desires to see the world come to know Christ. He is mature and even sought to refrain from commenting further to avoid stirring up further contention. When a brother of his reputation speaks a word that differs from our own opinions (on a tertiary issue, by the way—the attendance of a gay wedding is not even secondary), we ought to pause and thoroughly consider his reasoning. If we differ, any comment back should be well thought-out, grounded in the word of God, full of humility and irenicism, and laced with kindness toward a fellow member of the body of Christ. 

I would implore you, dear Christian—exercise humility and prudence, seek wisdom, pray before you speak (or tweet), and represent the manner of a mature Christian in all things said or done. Be irenic, even if it makes you uncomfortable. And in the words of James, “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. Therefore put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls” (James 1:19–21, emphasis added).